Snakespeare in the Park

It was an overcast September morning in the valley of Elmwood and the landscape around the farm looked as if it was painted with a heavy, damp brush. A thick ceiling of charcoal clouds hung low over the valley, catching on the jagged peaks of the Rockies like rabbit fur snagged in a brier patch. There was no sun to cast a shadow, only a flat, silver light that turned the fields of stubbled stalks to a muted, rusty bronze, while highlighting the much overdue repairs to the barn roof, as the black, gaping hollowed cracks seeped further across its bruised, burgundy shell.

The stale, musky air was thick with the scent of incoming rain. A quiet, stifled emptiness settled over the farm and the occasional rustle of the aspen and maple trees sounded unusually loud and somewhat lonely. There were no birds circling overhead, no twittering or chattering from the hedgerows. It was a day where even the animals had no inclination for anything other than staying in and lying in bed. All around and as far as any eye could see the landscape was dissipating into a soft, misty blur, sighing with ragged, shallow breaths.

As B-Jay the wonderful red Beetle car hummed a melancholy tune with his horn, his polished red paint the only spark of color in the morning’s world of muted grays and tans—he felt a huge aching in his engine, a throb that was bursting to beat against the stillness of the valley. Almost a month had passed since the circus had packed up, leaving the town park and he was missing his friends.

It was Aruna, the wise Great Horned owl’s idea to lie low for a while after the uproar at the circus. It seemed Digger Bo, the tumbling badger’s acrobatic display was indeed a new world record and the media outlets had focused on the events with much enthusiasm and a fervor that they hadn’t anticipated when hatching the Cirque Du Silly adventure. The local Elmwood Tribune newspaper ran the incident on page one all week long, with headlines of "The Dynamic Display of Digerbo!" "World Record Shattered," "Unmasking the Masked Hero!" "A Star Shines at the Cirque du Soleil," and "Who is Digerbo?"

The local radio KGPR 89.3 FM even aired an hour-long feature broadcast with a phone-in afterward that lasted two hours. Several people who were there that night called, each one giving a more elaborate story than the caller before as they all sought the $100 reward that the station was giving away to whoever could reveal the identity of the acrobat known as "Digerbo." It was a most unexpected and unneeded response that meant meeting up at the cottonwood tree would have to wait for a while until things had gone quiet. It had been over three weeks and B-Jay was starting to get bored—bored and lonely.

His thoughts turned to his recurring dreams of B-Gray and the nagging question that he couldn't seem to answer. It was like an unscratchable itch. There was only one way to find out if B-Gray was indeed his grandfather, but to answer it he would have to ask him, and to ask him he would have to find him. Maybe it was something that Sergeant Horatio Nelson the homing pigeon could help with. After all he had tracked down Cressida's son, but Horatio found people from their names and all B-Jay had was an old picture with the name B-Gray. He wasn't sure if that would be enough.

"Well you look like you have all the troubles of the world on your shoulders laddie," exclaimed Thaddeus the thespian spider, disturbing B-Jay's thoughts having crawled under the garage door. "Aruna is here with me, maybe you could be so kind as to let him in," he continued.

As B-Jay opened the door to greet Aruna the wise, Great Horned Owl, he felt an overwhelming surge of happiness that resulted in several few toots of his horn.

"What are you guys doing here? Not that I mind, it is a lovely surprise. Boy, I have missed you all. Is anyone else with you or is it just you two?" asked B-Jay, stammering with excitement.

"Hello B-Jay," greeted Aruna, flying up to the shelf that he occupied during the sleepover, giving his wings a shake as he landed.

"Well," informed Thaddeus, putting two of his eight legs squarely on the waistband of his kilt as if about to say something important. "As you know the circus adventure caused a few issues and we had to lie low for a while. After you dropped me off at the Playhouse I was able to keep my ears to the ground about the kafuffle we caused and Aruna has been visiting me late at night, for updates on the humans and their inquiries. I even managed to cut out some of the headlines from the papers just in case you wanted to show them to Digger Bo—seeing as he is now a celebrity in the limelight."

Thaddeus put the paper clippings, of which there were many, on B-Jay's bench before continuing. "It seems that the humans have now turned their attention to other more mundane matters so I think the coast is finally clear. We should be safe enough to have our next adventure."

"Adventure," queried B-Jay, his engine throbbing with excitement. "What adventure? Do the others know about this?"

"It was Aruna who came up with the idea. And no, the others have not been informed yet because we only decided on it last night," stated Thaddeus.

Any thoughts of B-Gray were suddenly pushed to the back of B-Jay's mind as he knew an adventure meant that he was going to see his friends again. "So what is this adventure and how did it come about?" he inquired curiously.

"It is quite a long story B-Jay," stated Aruna, clicking his beak. "I think it would be prudent for Thaddeus to tell the tale, as it is indeed a tale," he continued, settling on the shelf. He shuffled his taloned feet into a comfortable position before relaxing his head into his feathered neck, his shoulders spreading wide. His eyes looked rather large in the dim light of the garage.

"Now where to begin," pondered Thaddeus, scratching his arachnid head with a gentle scrape of a front leg. He reached into his sporran, producing a dry fly from a crumpled packet, and popped it into his mouth before finding the right place to start the story. Then, once he had finished his snack, he continued.

"As you know the 'Shakespeare in the Park' rendition of Hamlet starts this week in the 'old pavilion' at the back of the park near the woods, opposite the college campus. Well, during one of the rehearsals, which are proceeding along quite nicely might I add, I had a rather unexpected and somewhat pleasant incident involving a grass snake whose name is Ssizle."

"Oh!" interrupted B-Jay. "Did you know this snake? I don't believe we have ever heard of him, or even come across him in our adventures. Have you ever heard of him Aruna?" he questioned, thinking that being wise Aruna must somehow know everything.

"I knew there to be a few grass snakes inhabiting that part of the park, but I have never had the pleasure of meeting any of them. They tend to lie hidden in the undergrowth, keeping themselves to themselves. Although the grass snake is not a venomous species of snake, they generally experience negative reactions from humans, so they prefer to steer clear of interacting with others," answered Aruna.

"Anyway," continued Thaddeus, scratching his legs across the workbench to refocus B-Jay’s attention. "As we were rehearsing Act 3, Scene 1, I noticed Ssizle watching from the verge at the side of the stage. Well, that was not the curious part. The curious part was that he was mouthing the words perfectly, somewhat better than the actors who were still reading from scripts. He knew all the lines by heart. I was astounded. So, when the actors had packed up for the evening I went over and introduced myself to him in an effort to find out how a snake knew Shakespeare so well. It turns out that some of the scenes in Hamlet resonate with his own lowly opinion of himself. He has a rather unfortunate lisp, which I tried to reassure him was his own signature voice, but he seems to have spent so long feeling bad about himself, especially from the reactions humans give to snakes anyway, that he somehow felt that Hamlet was maybe a Shakespeare play written about a snake. Apparently his only joy in life has been listening to the college kids who are majoring in English Literature, when they venture to the pavilion to rehearse their lines. So much so that he knows all Shakespeare's plays and sonnets word for word. A most impressive achievement, don't you think?"

"Wow, that is so sad," replied B-Jay as a few drops of screen wash trickled across his windshield. "I mean the part about him feeling sad about himself," he stated, knowing nothing whatsoever about Shakespeare other than the fact he seems to appear in the park quite a lot. "So, forgive me for being stupid but where does an adventure come into any of this?"

"Well, I was asking Aruna for some thoughts on how to help Ssizle feel more self-confident and less negative about life when he came up with a way to feed two birds with one worm. Quite ingenious really."

B-Jay twitched his side mirrors feeling quite lost but felt compelled to ask, "How does cutting a worm in two create an adventure?"

Thaddeus and Aruna burst out laughing, so much so that Aruna nearly fell from the shelf and had to readjust his footing once he had calmed down.

"It is not a literal worm and two birds, my dear B-Jay," assured Thaddeus with a smile. "It is a phrase that means we thought of one idea—the worm—that led to two positive outcomes—the birds. In this case the worm is our adventure."

"So when did you meet this worm?" replied B-Jay, assuring them that he was joining in the joke, rather than adding to the confusion by giving his engine a chuckling throb.

Thaddeus appreciated his humor by clapping with six of his eight legs with a cry of "Bravo!" before continuing.

"So the adventure is this. Firstly I thought it might be nice for you all to experience my world of the performing arts while the pavilion has a stage set up. If you agree I will script some lines for everyone to perform and we can put on a show on the night before the theater packs away. This show will conclude with a performance at the very end where Ssizle gets to speak and show his love of Shakespeare and I get to offer words from a few musicals to show him that he is looking at himself all wrong. I think if he feels a part of something—doing something he loves—then he might feel that he is worthy. We get to have some fun and at the same time, we all get to feel good about helping a new friend feel better about himself. What do you think?" Thaddeus asked, hoping that B-Jay would approve.

"I think that is a wonderful idea, Thaddeus!" responded B-Jay, flashing his lights very brightly and almost blinding Thaddeus in the process. "We love helping and making new friends. They have been our best adventures yet."

"I was hoping you would say that," replied Thaddeus, grabbing Zippo's clipboard from the workbench. "Now I have some ideas already formulated, all I need to do is write them down." As he said this six of his legs simultaneously placed six pieces of paper in front of him and he started to scribble directions for each of them; scribbling incredibly fast as if he had done this a thousand times before.

Aruna and B-Jay had come to understand the measure of Thaddeus's talents from the Cirque Du Silly adventure, which they had only managed to pull off because of the spider's expert ability to direct performances. It had been the sole reason behind Digger Bo breaking a human world record—that and Digger Bo's dedication to follow Zippo's grueling training regimen. They hoped that one day Thaddeus could tell them more about his life and his obvious wealth of experience in the performing arts, but for now they were excited about getting a chance to enter his world of theater. Minutes later Thaddeus shuffled together the papers.

"There," he exclaimed, "I have a script for everyone. I think we should meet up tomorrow night at the pavilion and I will give these out with some directions etc., on how the show will proceed, along with some acting tips. We can borrow some of the stage clothes and go through rehearsals. Does that sound like a convenient plan for everyone?"

"I think that will be perfect," tooted B-Jay who was feeling much more like himself knowing that he was going to have another adventure with his friends. "What time do you think? I will meet everyone at the cottonwood tree and we can make our way to the park."

"Let's aim for you being at the tree at say 10:00 p.m. That way the park will be nice and quiet and we shouldn't be disturbed. Aruna and I will head to the tree now to let everyone know and we will meet you again tomorrow night!"

"Oh, this is so exciting!" exclaimed B-Jay as Aruna picked up Thaddeus carefully with one of his talons before taking flight from the garage.

B-Jay spent the rest of the evening wondering what the show would be about and what his role might be before eventually drifting off to sleep. Again his dreams were plagued by the questions of B-Gray and their possible familial relationship.

The next day came quickly and just after 10:00 p.m. they arrived in the park, as planned.

Nestled under the heavy timber of the pavilion, the Shakespearean stage stood waiting. The actors had long since gone home, but they had left behind the skeleton of their world. Wooden crates were stacked like castle towers, and a single sweep of B-Jay’s lights as he drew close, cast a cone of buttery light onto the center of the stage floor. Above them the crescent moon wandered lethargically among the autumn stars.

To B-Jay, the pavilion didn’t look like a simple picnic shelter anymore; with the mountains glowing purple behind it and the many trees that made up the woods that stretched out on either side, it looked like a royal palace being guarded by tall sentinels. The white cottonwood seeds drifted through the evening air like apparitions, and as he pulled to a stop, the "cast" exited the vehicle, climbing onto the stage platform.

B-Jay watched as Thaddeus drew everyone together on the stage, handing each one their acts and the lines he had scrawled for them to learn. He was very busy, yet somehow organized as several of his legs pointed at different things simultaneously. They all nodded in agreement before taking a space on the stage to practice their acts. B-Jay watched as they rehearsed, observing Thaddeus who went around to each one in turn, giving them pointers and demonstrations of how to exaggerate for effect and other particulars of stagecraft that he had acquired from years of experience.

He watched them all intently and it seemed as if Thaddeus was acting more like a spymaster than a stage master. B-Jay couldn't put his finger on what it was, but he felt sure that Thaddeus was keeping some things to himself as he observed him whispering in a dark corner of the stage, to Aruna and Cressida, out of the earshot of the others. Maybe there were a few hidden surprises to the show they were going to put on. He hoped so, he was really looking forward to it.

After an hour or so they all climbed back to their seats for the journey home and Thaddeus explained the basics of the acts and the format of the show, giving B-Jay directions for how he wished the lighting to work, having made B-Jay the lighting director. It seemed simple enough, nothing to intimidate B-Jay. Just when and where to shine his lights. The important moment that he had to pay attention to was during Zippo's magic act. He needed to make sure that the light was on Zippo when Digger Bo brings out the magic table so as not to reveal the hatch in the middle of the stage where Zippo was to conjure things from. It would not be much of a magic act if everyone could see rabbits crawling up from under a hole in the stage floor.

As they arrived back at the cottonwood tree they made arrangements for the night of the show, each one promising to practice their lines between now and then, before going their separate ways.

B-Jay spent the next day with very little to do. He had no lines to rehearse and no act to perform so he spent much of his time thinking about B-Gray again. He wondered what kind of life B-Gray had lived and if he was still having adventures like his own. He tried to imagine what having a grandfather might feel like and what he would say to him if he ever got the chance to find him. There was much to consider.

Once again the day turned to night and the night turned to day. B-Jay's waking thoughts turned to sleep-filled dreams and back again, as the circle of time quickly played out and in no time at all it was time for the show.

With a soft roll of his tires, he pushed open the door, leaving the safety of the garage to meet the crisp, mountain air and his friends with stories to tell. They were already waiting at the cottonwood tree when he arrived and they wasted no time gathering for their journey to the pavilion and the stage that awaited them.

As B-Jay crested the final rise toward the park, the sun began its slow descent behind the jagged teeth of the Rocky Mountains. The sky transformed into a canvas of burnt orange and deep violet, casting long, dramatic shadows across the landscape that looked like dark velvet curtains being drawn for the night. He imagined they were the drapes that were about to be pulled back to reveal the capes of kings and the veils of queens.

He gave a small, internal shiver of his engine as he approached the darkness of the woods. Tonight wasn't just any trip to the pavilion at the back of the park. Tonight, the air felt alive with the magic of the theater.

B-Jay took up his position directly to the front of the stage and waited as they all got into costume, preparing the equipment for each act. They had not considered it necessary to have a crowd as they were only there to experience the wonderful world of theater. All they really needed for that was the stage and Thaddeus to direct proceedings, but slowly and surely several animals emerged from the wood and the surrounding land, curious to understand the strange midnight events.

Digger Bo was to be the first act, although he was a little upset that he couldn't wear his spangly outfit that Thaddeus had made for him and was more than a little disgruntled when they informed him that his tumbling act could not include his world record 'quadruple' somersault. As understandable as it was to not be recognized he still felt like he was underperforming, being a celebrity now. He stepped on stage ready to go. Thaddeus stepped to the front of the stage and introduced him and his act. He nodded to B-Jay as a signal to shine the first spotlight before announcing...

"Ladies and gentlemen. Tonight renowned gymnast Digger Bo will be performing for you a series of acrobatics in a sequence of his own choreography. I hope you enjoy it," he said bowing to the crowd.

For the next five minutes Digger Bo went through his impressive routine, performing a series of cartwheels, backflips, somersaults, handsprings and forward rolls, all executed perfectly and all without pausing to rest. He stood having completed his performance with his furry hands stretched out to his side, twitching his whiskers; his beady black eyes inviting a response from the crowd. Although the audience was small, they cheered and seemed impressed. He bowed, scratched his tufted chin and exited to the back of the stage.

Next up was Zippo the theatrical ant and his magic act. He stepped into the spotlight wearing the hypnotist outfit he had used when hypnotizing Maxwell. It was a black suit and as hypnotists seem to perform a kind of magic, it could have been mistaken for being right for either profession. Zippo wanted to introduce himself and stepped into B-Jay's spotlight before speaking to the audience.

"Tonight ladies and gentlemen, I will be taking you back in time. Back in time to a world that once contained magic. A world where skilled magicians could conjure living things out of the very fabric of the air," Zippo announced, giving the audience a moment to realize the gravity of what he was about to undertake. He clicked his knuckles before removing the top hat from his head. He showed it to the audience putting his arm through the hat, which had a hole at the top. As he waved his arm out of the other side of the hat, he remarked, "as you can see there is nothing inside of this hat!"

At this point a rather cheeky squirrel couldn't help shouting out from the crowd, "Yes there is—it's your arm!"

The audience had started to grow in numbers with a few deer approaching and several of the audience couldn't help but laugh at the squirrel's cheeky remark.

Zippo laughed; he was a showman who loved the theater of daily life. This to him was encouraging as it meant he had their attention. He gave the squirrel a nod of approval before turning his head towards the back of the stage saying, "Digger Bo, my magic table if you please!"

As Digger Bo wheeled out the magic table, the front of which was hidden by a curtain, B-Jay swung the spotlight onto Zippo who distracted everyone while Digger Bo carefully placed the table over the stage trapdoor, showing them that having now removed his arm, the hat was totally empty.

"Now I will place my magic hat on my magic table. I will now take my magic wand from my jacket and with the aid of a few magic words, will produce a living rabbit from the hat."

As he pulled the wand from his pocket with one hand, he released a catch on the magic table. The rabbit could now climb from under the stage and up through the table and the hat. B-Jay centered his spotlight onto Zippo and the hat. Zippo held the wand aloft as if to summon magical power into it.

"All it takes ladies and gentlemen is one wave of my wand and the following words 'Alakazam' and as you can see once I tap the wand on the hat, I will magically produce a rabbit."

Zippo said the magic word, tapped the hat and reached inside tugging the fur in his hand upwards with the words, "Voila!"

The audience laughed hysterically as the face of Maxwell the large St Bernard dog appeared with a rather goofy expression on his face, ears flopping low and his tongue hanging out of the side of his floppy jowls.

"What!" cried Zippo, who was expecting it to be Jasmine the rabbit, from the warren as arranged. "This is not right," he said quickly ad-libbing, pushing Maxwell back down into the hat and to the floor below the stage. “Maybe I used the wrong spell. Let’s try a different one!”

He gave the magic wand a shake before saying the words "Abracadabra" and once again tapped his wand on the hat. This time he was relieved when Jasmine, the white rabbit from the warren, came bounding out.

"As you can see ladies and gentlemen, a rabbit as foretold." Zippo was just about to take a bow, expecting cries of "ooooh" and "ahhhhh" as the audience tried to work out how he could have done such an amazing feat of conjuring, when they all began laughing. Zippo turned around to see what they were laughing at only to see the monocled face of Reginald the Riddling Rabbit, his head poking over the rim of the hat with a rather serious expression.

"Two for the price of one!" shouted out the squirrel once more as he pointed to the hat, laughing hysterically.

"That wasn't supposed to happen," said a rather confused Zippo putting his hands on his hips before giving his head a quizzical scratch. "No, seriously that wasn't meant to happen. I was supposed to conjure an owl next. This wand must be malfunctioning because the spell was definitely correct."

He tapped the wand several times on the hat as if to shake the magic back into place. Before he could say, "Let's try that once more. This time I will use a stronger spell to summon a bird of the night, an owl," several rabbits started leaping from the hat, one for every time he hit it with the wand.

Bemused, he panicked, turned and quickly ran to the back of the stage looking for Thaddeus to explain to him how things weren't quite going according to plan. B-Jay dimmed the lights; he suspected Thaddeus had planned the whole charade. B-Jay smiled at this wonderful piece of trickery and as the curtains closed, preparing for the next act, he looked at the audience who appeared to be really enjoying themselves. They certainly had doubled in number since the show began. Cressida the proud black cat laughed at Zippo as she prepared herself to go on next.

Moment later Thaddeus appeared from behind the curtain to introduce the next act.

"And now, ladies and gentlemen, we have a tale of love. A tale of Shakespearean love that has become quite possibly the world's most famous play of love that can never be. I present to you:

'The Star-Crossed Lovers' starring Cressida and Maxwell."

The curtains draw back to reveal Juliet looking down from her tower (Cressida standing on a pile of boxes) to receive her lover, calling sweetly from below (Maxwell in a cape) as the light of the moon casts down on the stage (B-Jay using one of his headlights).

Cressida: (puts a paw to her forlorn-browed expression, speaking in a voice tinged with longing for her lover) "Romeo, Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo?"

Maxwell: (Waving both paws to gain her attention while looking up and speaking in a whisper) "Pssst Cressida, I am down here... look. Below you!"

Cressida: (Looks at him with both paws on her hips and a scowl to show she is not amused) "We've started! Please can I act out the lines of my soliloquy without you ruining things! I will start again—you just sit there and listen."

Cressida: (pauses then repeats her lines with the same love-lost tone) "Romeo, Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse thy name; Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, And I’ll no longer be a Capulet... 'Tis but thy name that is my enemy; Thou art thyself, though not a Montague."

Maxwell: (Shuffles his cape so that it is straight before butting in again) "I know it's dark under this dim moonlight but it's not Montague, it is me, Maxwell! Look!" (Maxwell waves his arms again, this time standing on his haunches so that Cressida can see him better. He calls out to B-Jay asking him to brighten his headlights)

Cressida: (Trying to remain calm and professional decides to ignore Maxwell and continues her lines) "What’s Montague? it is nor hand, nor foot, Nor arm, nor face, nor any other part Belonging to a man. O, be some other name! What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet..." (Before she can finish the rest of her lines Maxwell interrupts again)

Maxwell: (Speaks in a muffled voice trying to restore his head from under the cape) "I don't think it is roses you can smell, I’m quite sure it is ham. Whoever wore this cape last was eating ham. Can't you smell it?"

Cressida: (Looks down from above—her fur ruffling along her spine as her tail fluffs to twice its normal size. She decides to move on to keep his attention before the play falls apart) "For the love of Marlowe, will you please focus just for one second—ignore the smell and deliver your lines: 'With love’s light wings did I o’er-perch these walls!'"

Maxwell: (Tripping over his own tail as he twists and turns sniffing the air) "With... with love’s... uh... heavy paws I did... o’er-perch the... (suddenly the smell overpowers him as a breeze wafts in from backstage) the smell of that ham sandwich isn't on this cape, it's coming from backstage, somewhere near the prop table!"

Cressida: (Looking very bristled and twice her normal size, her face contorted with a mixture of incredulity and rage) "Maxwell! Don't you dare—"

Maxwell: (Trying to heed Cressida’s words but at the same time overpowered by the smell of food he flicks his head from Cressida to the ham so many times that he starts to become dizzy) "I’ll be right back! Parting is such sweet sorrow, but ham is surely sweeter!" (He bounds off-stage with a joyful "Woof!", knocking over a cardboard balcony).

Cressida: (Cressida alters her stance to face the audience smiling) "There it is ladies and gentlemen. The tale that epitomizes star-crossed love. We began as a love story, we plummeted into a tragedy, and now, thanks to a hungry stomach, we have ended as a complete and utter comedy. The only thing we are missing is the obligatory two fools of the play. Oh wait—was that us? Thaddeus!" (Cressida exits the stage smiling while holding up her skirt like a jilted lover)

The curtains closed on the stage again amidst the sound of uproarious laughter. Thaddeus appeared from between them addressed the audience once more informing, "there will be a short interval before our final play of the evening." He then disappeared backstage to prepare himself into costume.

Cressida approached Thaddeus as he was preparing for his act with Ssizle, which was up next.

"So how did I do?" she inquired giving her tail a pleasing flick. "Did I pull it off okay?"

Thaddeus looked at her with a cheeky Scottish grin saying, "My lady, you were so good that I forgot that it was all planned. You were stupendous and definitely right; all it took was a carefully placed ham sandwich to get Maxwell on par!"

Zippo, having finally realized that his whole act was also staged, stepped forward as recompense to introduce the last act. "Ladies and gentlemen," he began, spinning his baseball cap around as he moonwalked across the stage. "Now for our final act of the evening I give you the true magic of a play titled:

'The Five Acts of Loving Oneself' starring 'Ssizle and Thaddeus'

When the curtains drew back once more a rather apprehensive Ssizle slithered to the front of the stage dressed as Hamlet as Thaddeus scuttled to the opposite side dressed as court advisor to the King. Both looked very dashing in their Elizabethan robes. B-Jay shone one light on each of them, alternating them on and off as each one took it in turns to deliver their lines. Knowing that this was the epic play of the evening with a special motive of helping out Ssizle he gave a few encouraging toots from his horn to get the crowd going; a crowd which had grown much larger as the evening had progressed. It seemed as though every animal for miles around had made their way over. B-Jay hoped this didn’t have a negative effect on Ssizle's performance.

Ssizle took a moment to compose himself before summoning all his courage. He reminded himself how much he loved Shakespeare and hoped that his lisp would not spoil things.

Act I: The Desire to Disappear

Ssizle: "O, that thiss too ssolid flesh would melt, thaw and ressolve itself into a dew! Or that the Everlassting had not fix'd his canon 'gainsst sself-sslaughter! O God! God! How weary, sstale, flat and unprofitable, sseem to me all the usses of this world!"

Thaddeus: "Unprofitable? Weary? My dear laddie, you’re looking at the scenery through a dusty lens! The world isn't flat; it’s a revolving stage! You aren't meant to melt away; you’re meant to take your bow while the orchestra is still playing! 'The world is a carousel of color, wonderful, wonderful color! Look at the sky, look at the sea, look at the things for you and me!'"

Act II: The Question of Being

Ssizle: "To be, or not to be: that iss the quesstion: whether 'tiss nobler in the mind to ssuffer the sslings and arrowss of outrageouss fortune, or to take armss againsst a ssea of troubless, and by oppossing end them?"

Thaddeus: "The question isn't whether to 'be'—you already are! And the world is much better for it. You mustn't just 'suffer' the fortune the world gives you; you must write your own script! 'I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul.'"

Act III: The Physical Form

Ssizle: "But I, that am not sshaped for ssportive trickss, nor made to court an amorouss looking-glasss; I, that am rudely stamp'd... I have no delight to passs away the time, unlesss to sspy my sshadow in the ssun and desscant on mine own deformity."

Thaddeus: "Deformity? Fiddlesticks! You aren't 'rudely stamped,' you are elegantly designed! The looking-glass only shows the skin, Ssizle, but the theater reveals the soul. 'Flowers are happy in the summer. Rain is happy to the ground. It’s happiness to be just what you are, for there’s a purpose for your being here.'"

Act IV: The Weariness of Society

Ssizle: "Tired with all thesse, for resstful death I cry, as to behold dessert a beggar born, and needy nothing trimm'd in jollity... Tired with all thesse, from thesse would I be gone, ssave that, to die, I leave my love alone."

Thaddeus: "Oh, Ssizle! Put down thy shroud and pick up the spotlight! We don't exit stage left just because the first act is weary. We march on! 'To fight for the right, without question or pause, to be willing to march into hell for a heavenly cause!'"

Act V: The Finale of Self-Love

Ssizle: "When, in dissgrace with fortune and men’ss eyess, I all alone beweep my outcasst sstate, and trouble deaf heaven with my bootlesss criess, and look upon myself and cursse my fate, wisshing me like to one more rich in hope..."

Thaddeus: "Curse your fate? My dear Ssizle, you are the only 'you' in the entire history of the theater! Stop looking at the other actors and look at the voice you carry. A voice that singsss like the breeze! 'I am what I am. I am my own special creation. So come take a look. Give me the hook or the ovation!'"

(Ssizle and Thaddeus look up toward the moon contemplating all that has been said and countered. As they do so a very wise Great Horned Owl appears from on high, in a tree, to deliver a deliberation from the heavens:)

Act VI: The Verdict

The moon is a mirror reflecting what’s true,

It doesn’t see faults—it sees only you.

For up in the heavens, where all things occur,

The line between perfect and imperfect blur.

Ssizle, you worried your tongue was too long,

That your lisp was a hiss and never a song,

But the audience listened as you spoke each word,

And the song that you sung, the forest it heard.

But you do not need the cheers from this park,

To know that your spirit can shine in the dark.

For diamonds have edges, and stars have a glow,

And a seed needs no one's permission to grow.

So remember the lesson you learned here tonight,

That now and forever to shine your own light,

For life is the story and the world is its stage,

So be true to yourself as you write every page.

Once Aruna had delivered his verdict, all the actors gathered together at the front of the stage, bowing to their audience as Thaddeus closed the show with some final words from Mr. Shakespeare...

"Our revels now are ended. These our actors, as I foretold you, were all spirits and are melted into air, into thin air... Goodnight!"

The silence that followed lay heavy yet magical; the atmosphere electrically charged. Then, instantaneously, the crowd erupted together. The raccoons chattered and the badgers gave a deep bellowing cry as the squirrels flicked their bushy tails around in sweeping circles, clapping furiously. The deer stamped their hooves, as rabbits pounded the grass underfoot, and the echo of every applauding animal that had stepped from the shadows of the woods to watch them perform echoed loudly off the Rocky Mountains.

After a continuous five minutes of rapturous applause, one by one the animals melded back into the dark of the woods, leaving B-Jay and the others alone with the night. The actors spent a few minutes putting everything back as they found it for the Shakespeare players who would be back in the morning. Then, as they all took up their usual positions in the car for the journey home, Thaddeus took one more moment to say goodbye to Ssizle.

"My dear Ssizle, you spoke of dreams as though they were shadows. The shadows you lived in were but curtains waiting to be pulled back. And dreams are but chances. A dream is a chance for love and life, and the light that dreams bring when we but ask of them reveals them to us. You asked 'To be or not to be,' and Elmwood has answered: 'Be our friend. Be our star. Be the music in the grass.' For what are we, if not friends who have finally awoken to find one another?"

Ssizle watched his new friends as they departed for home, turning out of the park. He didn't look at the ground. He didn’t hang his head in shame. For the first time, he coiled himself high, his head held aloft, as regal as any king's. Then he slithered slowly across the grass, returning to his home in the shadows behind the pavilion.

Reference Notes:

The author makes no claim to the passages in the story that appeared in bold. These are quotes that were gratefully used to emphasize the moral of the story about loving oneself. For reference they appear below with details of their origins.

'The Star-Crossed Lovers' starring Cressida and Maxwell."

Cressida: "Romeo, Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse thy name..."

·         Source: William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, (Act 2, Scene 2) Lines 33–36

Cressida: "'Tis but thy name that is my enemy; Thou art thyself, though not a Montague."

·         Source: William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, (Act 2, Scene 2) Lines 38–39

Cressida: "What’s Montague? it is nor hand, nor foot... What’s in a name? That which we call a rose..."

·         Source: William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, (Act 2, Scene 2) Lines 40–44

Cressida: "With love’s light wings did I o’er-perch these walls!"

·         Source: William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, (Act 2, Scene 2) Line 66

'The Five Acts of Loving Oneself' starring 'Ssizle and Thaddeus'

Act I: The Desire to Disappear

Sssizel: "O, that this too too solid flesh would melt, thaw and resolve itself into a dew! Or that the Everlasting had not fix'd his canon 'gainst self-slaughter! O God! God! How weary, stale, flat and unprofitable, seem to me all the uses of this world!"

·         Source: William Shakespeare, Hamlet (Act 1, Scene 2)

Thaddeus: "'The world is a carousel of color, wonderful, wonderful color! Look at the sky, look at the sea, look at the things for you and me!'"

·        Source: "The Spectrum Song" from Walt Disney's Wonderful World of Color (1961). Written by Richard M. Sherman and Robert B. Sherman.

Act II: The Question of Being

Sssizel: "To be, or not to be, that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing end them?"

·         Source: William Shakespeare, Hamlet (Act 3, Scene 1)

Thaddeus: "'I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul.'"

·         Source: The poem "Invictus" (1875) by William Ernest Henley.

Act III: The Physical Form

Sssizel: "But I, that am not shaped for sportive tricks, nor made to court an amorous looking-glass; I, that am rudely stamp'd... I have no delight to pass away the time, unless to spy my shadow in the sun and descant on mine own deformity."

·         Source: William Shakespeare, Richard III (Act 1, Scene 1)

Thaddeus: "'Flowers are happy in the summer. Rain is happy to the ground. It’s happiness to be just what you are, for there’s a purpose for your being here.'"

·         Source: The song "Happiness" from the musical You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown (1967). Written by Clark Gesner.

Act IV: The Weariness of Society

Sssizel: "Tired with all these, for restful death I cry, as to behold desert a beggar born, and needy nothing trimm'd in jollity... Tired with all these, from these would I be gone, save that, to die, I leave my love alone."

·         Source: William Shakespeare, Sonnet 66

Thaddeus: "'To fight for the right, without question or pause, to be willing to march into hell for a heavenly cause!'"

·         Source: The song "The Impossible Dream (The Quest)" from the musical Man of La Mancha (1965). Written by Mitch Leigh and Joe Darion.

Act V: The Finale of Self-Love

Sssizel: "When, in disgrace with fortune and men’s eyes, I all alone beweep my outcast state, and trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries, and look upon myself and curse my fate, wishing me like to one more rich in hope..."

·         Source: William Shakespeare, Sonnet 29

Thaddeus: "'I am what I am. I am my own special creation. So come take a look. Give me the hook or the ovation!'"

·         Source: The song "I Am What I Am" from the musical La Cage aux Folles (1983). Written by Jerry Herman.